It's been a little bit since I posted , lots going on.
Okay... so we all have up days and down days. Sick days and well days. The important point to this is just don't stop moving and just don't give up! The last week and a half or so has been pretty up and down. Bad weather, battling upper respiratory issues and then having a severe allergic reaction the other day kind of put a damper on things...BUT I never gave up! I kept moving even though I was slower, ran a little less, took breaks when I needed it, and switched up my routine when I couldn't run. A little Zumba on the Xbox, some workout videos I found through Pinterest, I just kept moving in some way. No matter how little it may seem, those little bits add up. Remember if you are moving, you are still lapping those on the couch!
So with that said, we all face challenges and part of our journey is to work through them. It would have been extremely easy to slide back into old ways and just gave up and stopped. Nope not anymore. I have done it a thousand times and that was a thousand times too many. I WILL NOT STOP! That chant is in my head and will remain there. I have ran in the rain, in the cold and while sick. I will not stop!
I'm not doing this for anyone but me. I use to think that in order to be loved or worthy of it, I would have to be that size 2 and have the "perfect body". I held on to that for a long time.... not anymore. I don't post those skinny itty bitty girls for motivation. Know why?? Because that is not attainable for me. I have made peace that I earned my stripes, I'm not in my teens anymore so there isn't going to be taught lovely skin... I have had 2 c-sections so that lovely flat washboard stomach isn't going to happen. But you know what.... that's OK. I will be the best that I can make myself. I don't want to be skinny.... I want to be HEALTHY! I want to run that 5K (faster), 10K, half marathon and hopefully a full marathon. Can I do it overnight? well of course not! But I will get there.
I want to be the example to my kids. I want my daughters to see how hard it is to get back from this. My oldest daughter went on my second run with me today, I let her see the out of breath, side hurting, knee hurting me...but she also got to see that I didn't give up no matter how out of breath or tired I was. I want my girls to be proud. I also don't want them to ever have to go through the ridicule and outcast feeling of growing up overweight and not in that neat little mold that the media likes to stuff girls in. I want them to know it's OK not to be a size 2 but it's NOT OK to be overweight. It's OK to indulge in a cookie but not the whole damn box!
I want my husband to be proud of me... I know he loves me and has told me more than once that he loves me no matter the size etc... I want my family to be proud.... but in the end this isn't for them. I have to do it for me... so that's what I'm doing, One step at a time, one foot in front of the other.
